funny faces :)

the one thing about a nightfloat rotation that i'm grateful for {yea, there IS one}is that i'm still there to see emma off to school in the morning and i get to pick her up early every day from daycare.  the look on her face when i pop my head into her classroom just melts my heart every time.  she and her girlfriends are usually engaged in some kind of deep and meaningful baby conversation while they play on the inside climbing gym....and i usually stand still and silent watching them play for a few moments (while i wonder JUST what they are talking about!)....and suddenly she catches a glimpse of me.  first the face is a surprised one, like she's been caught doing something she shouldn't {and lord knows she knows THAT face well!}....and then a HUGE smile spreads across her little chubby face enough to melt me into a dribbly pool of mommy love.  she gets me every time.

it looks a little something like this....

she and i spend the afternoon playing and laughing and enjoying simple moments together. some days i feel guilty for my work....guilty that my hours are so long and i'm so exhausted when i get home.  its been something i've struggled with for a long time...and something i know i'll always have to grapple.  but, my love for her doesn't need to be defended and i can see in her eyes how much she feels that love and loves me in return.  and i believe that i am a better role model and mother to her for my ability to also serve others as a part of my work.  that being said, she will always be my top priority....and i live for our snuggles and everyday moments :)

still....it doesn't ever get easy to be away from this little sugar plum.  ever. thankfully i have some time off in the next couple of days to recuperate and catch up on snuggles and bedtime stories and this rotation will be over by the end of next week.

in some of my down time at night, i catch up on emails and what's going on in the world.  i have my kindle so i'm flying through books...its SO FUN to read for fun again!!!!!! ryan and i have started talking about our 5 year anniversary, too. it's a ways away....we celebrate our 3rd this october...but we've always said that we want to do something fabulous. we've talked about greece or italy....both places i've been and adore. greece is quite possibly my favorite place on earth and i can't wait to experience it with ryan.  by the time we celebrate 3 years of marriage we will have already had two children!! i'll still be a fellow when we celebrate year 5 so we thought about waiting for these big ticket trips for when we have more money to comfortably afford them.  you can certainly do those trips on a budget....but we don't really want to! when we go, we want to go all out.

then entered Napa Valley. we both loved that idea and it quickly moved to the top of our list. so, i've spent a bit of time starting to investigate..... :) for anyone who has been, i'd love suggestions!!!

 

baby ben is getting bigger by the day!

How Far Along: 22 weeks!

Size of baby:  baby ben is the size of a small doll and weighs in at 1b!!

Total Weight Gain/Loss: 14 pounds!holy moly!

Maternity Clothes: bring on the maternity pants and sundresses!! still wearing my old tops but those elastic waistbands and flowy dresses are my best friend these days :) i'm getting alot of use out of simple tanks from Target.

Gender: it's a boy!!!! Benjamin Ryan Murphy, we can't wait to meet you!!!!

What I miss: sleeping on my belly! and i'm not even going to lie....a glass of red wine is going to taste really good come the end of october.

Cravings:citrus & total raisin bran. i'm wierd. oh and frozen yogurt, yes please!!!

Symptoms: heartburn! somehow ben is higher than emma was {aren't 2nd babies supposed to sit low??} and likes to kick.  nothing a little tums can't fix.

Best Moment this week: catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror at the gym.....i'm huge but i'm still moving....and still keeping up with my weights and cardio! i felt proud.  feeling my little man dance inside and buying him a few cute new outfits this week.  and, of course, his sisters obsession with helping me lotion up the belly. so cute!!!!