just what i needed

saturday was what i needed it to be.  i'll start with that.  and i'm feeling more like me again.  i think sitting inside {in the crazy ER no less} is driving me a bit insane and the feeling of the cold crisp air on my skin coupled with the company of my family is just what i needed.  i've got a serious case of senioritis as i anxiously await the end of residency in june and there isn't much to do about other than wait. and i'm a doer so this is hard for me.

but saturday was a start. i took a long hard literal look at myself in the mirror and and said "snap out of it".  i have a tendency to let long hours get the better of me and exhausting rotations engulf me in a way that i'm still trying to understand. i'm working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week right now and it's kicking my butt.  but...as with everything else in residency....the pain is only temporary.  and while i entered medical school and residency alike with a special kind of reserve set aside for all the long hours and sleepless nights....i sense that my "trust fund" is wearing thin.  i'm tired. and not just in the literal sense, but there's that too.  i'm tired of jumping through hoops, working ridiculous hours for a pay that should be considered criminal.  i'm ready to do what i've been working my whole life to do. i'm ready to have weekends with my family to explore and snuggle and tear apart the house. and while i know it's just a few months away....it's exactly that. a few months away. so close i can feel it yet far enough away to make it seem like forever.

but saturday was a start. and as always, my plans needed a little modification ;)  i fully intended to sleep in but WELL, ahem, two children who normally sleep so soundly and peacefully decided that 6:30 sounded like a great time to get the party started.  ha! we lounged and played for a long while and then packed up and headed to the botanical garden.  emma was happy and chatty in the backseat and ben was in on it too.  until, of course, we pull into the parking lot and i turn around to find them both completely passed out. go figure. it took us nearly 3 hours to get out of the house and they're dreaming as we put the car in park. so we headed home. i took off for a run.  the crystal blue skies and crisp air helped clear my head....and by the time i got home, the kids were up and ready for round 2 :)  we headed back to the gardens and enjoyed the scenery together.

it was a good day. i needed that :) and my little munchkins & my honey, as always, came to my rescue!